...Albania



Berat


Three things define our time in Albania- trying to keep warm, eating meat and eating borek.

Trying to keep warm
Arriving in the freezing cold capital Tirana, we had to drink the homemade sloe gin Kate had given us before leaving to warm ourselves up (in bed, fully clothed in hats, scarves and gloves). The local wine also proved a winner at if not warming us up then at least distracting us from being cold. One glass of local red wine I had in a small town called Berat smelt of pickled onions and, I'm delighted to say, didn't disappoint in the taste department either...




Trying to keep warm in Tirana



Eating meat
You can't avoid it. In Tirana, we ended up in a tiny place with a whole rotisserie chicken, toast and beer. It's all our poor spoken Albanian could stretch to but to be honest, I think it's all the place offered. The perfect comfort food.

Chicken, toast and beer in Tirana

In Berat, we had 'lunch of the trip'. We ended up with a proper kebab of different meats, lemony yogurt, salad (hurrah!) and chips (double hurrah!), all wrapped up in a fluffy flat bread.

Yeeeeessssss!

Our meat feast continued in this magical town when Finn ordered 'pigling' an amazing mistranslation of 'piglet'. We could've ordered any of the following: brain, liver, heart, spleen, kidney, tongue and entrails. We didn't. The following night the mistranslation was all ours. Meated out we ordered what we thought was mixed mezze, imagining a healthy plate of olives, salad and hummus. However, in Albanian, meat is 'meso'. We ended up with a plate of the aforementioned organs. It was an experience.

Borek
After a night of lying freezing in bed with the heater only heating the ceiling and being kept awake by its disco light we decided to change hostels. On our way to the next place that didn't actually exist anymore we fell through the door of a kebab place and pointed at the first thing we saw. It just so happened to be a tray full of hot borek straight out of the oven. Inside was melted cheese and ham. Borek of the trip.  Incidentally, yesterday on our 9 hour bus to Athens, Finn managed to sink 3 and a half boreks (is that the plural? Perhaps 'Borai'?).

The finest borek in the Balkans

Our last meal in Albania was special. Gjirokastra, the town of a thousand steps, was experiencing its first power cut in 10 years and the water had frozen. We went out in the cold and dark to find somewhere that might feed us. A man beckoned us in to his cafe and offered us a choice of goulash or 'something traditional'. We took both. The goulash was the perfect warmer-upper. It was a beef and tomato stew and you squeezed lemon over the top. I taught the owner the word 'squeeze'. He repeated it, laughed hysterically and then rubbed my back. We decided he was probably quite drunk.  He then brought us rice cakes cooked in egg with dried mint. Not a bit of meat in sight. We drank the local wine which was poured from a plastic bottle and then went back to our lovely hostel, warm and happy to find the power back on.

Chef/back rubber with rice cakes. Typical Albanian scene in background

We left Albania with heavy hearts, full stomachs and, despite the cold, a warm feeling from the hospitality the wonderful people showed us.

Time for some vegetables. Oh hello Greece, land of the kebab...

...Montenegro

The view of Kotor and the coast, after climbing ten million steps (or something)

Twenty four hours in Montenegro. How much local food and drink can one sample in such a short space of time? The answer my friends is a fair bit. A fair old bit indeed.

And so we arrived in Kotor, another off season tourist town. A museum of buildings with Christmas decorations up still (it's gone, get over it).  Cherry strudel was sampled and enjoyed, cherry and almond strudel was enjoyed a hundred times more.

The local market was like an open air Waitrose - local olives, cloudy olive oil, cherry brandy (we'll come back to that later), cheese, proscutto ham, blood oranges, fat pomegranates etc.  We were beckoned over by a lady to try the ham (delicious). She then proceeded to let us try all the different types of cheese she had, telling us which animal they were from by making the sound of the animal. You don't get that in Waitrose. Very entertaining. We bought ham and cheese (baaaa) from her. Interestingly, at Waitrose prices...

Ham and cheese in the local market

As we were by the coast, I allowed Finn to sample the local delicacy of 'stuffed squid'. We found a suitably empty restaurant (not difficult) and nestled ourselves in next to a Christmas tree with massive baubles. The waitress lit a candle. We joked that it was romantic. She laughed. She went away and on came a compilation of love songs starting with Careless Whisper. We learnt a lot about the Montenegran's sense of humour. Finn ordered, and I quote, 'stuffed squid with fish and herbs in the traditional way'.  Indeed. Finn claimed it had a 'satisfying taste of the sea' and that he felt 'squids in'. Other equally poor puns followed. Worryingly, I also heard him utter the words 'it was almost too big a portion'. But I took comfort in the fact he said 'almost'. And the fact that there weren't no squiddy tentacle left on that there plate.

There you go, 'stuffed squid with fish and herbs in the traditional way'

'It was almost too big a portion'. Clearly

We finished our meal with the local cherry brandy. Here is a list of words uttered when we were trying to pin down its taste - spicy, childhood, Christmas, medicinal, syrupy, TCP, plasters. In a nutshell, very tasty. We drank up as soon as the first notes of the Titanic song blared out, and made a swift exit.

Onwards to Albania...

...Bosnia

Bosnia

This picture shows you Sarajevo in all it's snowy beauty and a deliriously happy me! Not only have I fallen in love with Sarajevo but I have been delighted by the culinary treats we've been served up.

 
All over Bosnia you see the word cevapi which is basically a pocket of fluffy bread with about ten grilled sausages of beef stuffed inside and some raw onion on the side. The meat is cooked on a large grill and they roll it around with the bread so that the bread absorbs all the lovely juices. It is delicious but really, it's too much meat, even when you´re freezing your little feet off.

Cevapi.

We spent our time in Sarajevo in awe of the city and it's bloody history which is pretty much evident wherever you look. Because of the weather we ducked in and out of coffee shops, keeping warm with thick, gritty Bosnian coffee and the Bosnian delicacy of baked apple filled with walnut paste and topped with squirty cream which went down very nicely indeed, thank you very much. It also had the added bonus of being part of our ´five a day´which surely canceled out some of that meat.

Finn and Pudding

Our visit to Mostar to see the famous bridge that had been destroyed in the Balkans conflict (and now magnificently restored) enabled us to try steak with sweet cream cheese and a fried egg on top. It shouldn't work. But it kind of does! Unfortunately ´breaded brains´ were off the menu that day. I can also highly recommend the local wine which doesn't seem to give you a hangover.

Steak and chips, Bosnian style. Oh, and the famous bridge in the background

In Bosnia we've stayed in some great hostels with kitchens so we've been able to cook a fair bit. Not only is this saving us some money but it's also allowed me to indulge in my guilty pleasure that is ´foreign supermarkets´.

And so, we move onwards. We are currently in a rainy (yet still very beautiful) Dubrovnik in Croatia and heading to Albania with a quick stopover in Montenegro. We have 24 hours to hunt out the cherry strudel which apparently, they do very well. Can't wait.

Me and lunch in Dubrovnik - I should point out I am holding Finn's lunch too

...Belgium, Germany and Croatia

Belgium

Horrific picture but it does the job. Crisps + `pickles`. Dream combo.

Germany

We had one night in Frankfurt and we knew that there was only one thing to do. Find sausages. I was also on the lookout for `Handkas mit musik`, otherwise known as `pickled cheese` (not as romantic sounding, I know). Tired and hungry after a long day travelling from London, we walked to the centre, happy if we found a touristy place that would serve us up some good German grub. And lo and behold there in the the middle of a large square was an `alpine lodge`! What could be more touristy? One look at the menu and we knew what we had to do. We squeezed ourselves in between an American couple and a Chinese family. `Authentic` might not be the right word to use here but we were in for a treat. We ordered two pints of Apfelwein (flat, sour cider) and devoured the pickled cheese that had been taunting me in my dreams ever since I`d read about it. Describing it is difficult but I`d say it`s like an edam that`s been sat out in the sun for a bit and then drenched in vinegary oil with caraway seeds and onions. Amazing! We also decided to share a plate of sausages with mustard, sweet gherkins and lemony potato salad. Thank god we shared.  We were fit to burst and very pleased with ourselves.

Pickled cheese! With a plate of sausages in the background

The tiny Chinese lady next to us had the guts to order pork knuckle with mashed potatoes and sauerkraut. I never knew that pigs had such huge knuckles! She did an appalling job of finishing (although she may have been put off by us watching). I wish I`d got a picture. Really, it was massive!


Croatia

Borek, borek and more borek! We have been indulging in our love of the curled sausage of filo pastry (usually filled with cheese or `meat`). I also ate veal stew with rice (nicer than it sounds). However, I couldn't finish my dinner because the restaurant was playing Tom Jone`s greatest hits. I seemed to lose my appetite when `Sex Bomb´ came on. Go on, try eating during that song. It`ll make queasy, trust me.  The highlight of Croatia so far has, without a doubt, been the MASSIVE SAUSAGE we saw in the market. It was a special moment.
 

Look at it! It`s massive!

Whilst in Zagreb, we went to a fantastic museum called the Museum of Broken Relationships.  The exhibits consist of mementos people have given of their past relationships along with a short text explaining their significance. It got me thinking what memento I would give the museum from our relationship (still together don`t worry, this is hypothetical). And I think I`d just do a shop in Lidl`s and drop the bag off.

Coming soon, Bosnia! Bosnia! What on earth do they eat in Bosnia?! I don`t know! But I`ll find out for you...